Continue reading. I still receive punishment spankings for things, but they are not very often anymore. I get to hear why some other wives get spanked and all the wives want to tell the pastor why they got spanked. For better or worse, most states had laws restricting what was allowable between husband and wife in the bedroom. Now, I will agree that vengeance itself is best left to God (and my experience is that He is quite good at it when we leave it to Him), but where people like wolf demand forgiveness, they contemptibly do at least two things: 1. I dont know where I have ever read such a torrent of self-satisfied sanctimony. He was so different than the other Christians I had met, many of whom tormented my Jewish best friend and my completely secular family. Christian Domestic Discipline - 09-23-2011, 11:08 PM. Ive dated a few, been engaged to one. I submit that every target of physically, emotionally or spiritually abusive behavior is our sister or brother, and that no perpetrator, absent real repentance, is to be embraced as family. WebJennas Punishment Spanking (Christian Domestic Discipline Marriage #1) During a disagreement, Jenna storms out of the house without telling her husband where she's going. He thinks this makes me more submissive, and thus more available to learn from Gods word. Period. Gary, You have said nothing. What a shame men have come along and subverted His purposes for women. That jerk exploited me financially and was a self absorbed loser who took no interest in me or my career: he made the entire relationship about him and getting his needs met and didnt care about meeting my needs. I dont know if my Mom was ever spanked. Jesus taught that followers of his are not to lord authority over each other, but you are advocating that. Me. Men who push the defend women because women are little delicate flowers view rarely to never actually defend women. And it just baffles me that getting hit makes your marriage closer. Before we left he decided he had had enough and took me to our room and spanked me. I got support from friends and it was only when I opened up to them that they helped me see it was wrong. Previously I have shown Domestic Discipline to be both a Biblical concept as well as a historical practice amongst husbands for thousands of years on my Instagram page @biblicalsexandiscipline and on my blog Biblicalgenderroles.com as well as podcasts Jennifer, I moved your comment to a new post so more people could see it and respond. Weenie-chopping? Our pastor teaches us how the Lord puts our Husbands over us as our masters. Do not expect her to be silent through this experience though. But when you seriously contend that there mere fact that our Lord appeared first to women and told them to tell the men negates the creation ordinance, Deborahs curse of wimpy Barak and the clear words of the Holy Spirit on this subject through the Apostle Paul, then I suggest you have really lost touch with the will of God. Christianity is a lot harder on women and children than it is for men, the men are living like kings and gods, promoting their superiority and rule while women and children are living like trapped miserable bottom kissing slaves. WebBDSM provides a helpful framework for communication and safe, consensual exploration. The Bible says that husbands are to submit to their wives, Eph 5:21: Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. That day we were getting ready to spend the day with my parents. There is a beautiful surrender that comes with allowing myself to be vulnerable and submissive. The modesty issue and him not wanting you to get any kind of lingerie shows a real distorted view of sexuality. Domestic Disciplining is consistent with the natural instincts of men and women which is why it has been practiced for so long, and why it will keep coming back over and over whether you like it or not. You cannot say you respect and love an adult when you treat them like a child and all these women who are letting their husbands hit them you cant love yourself. Daisy, my comment was actually a response to LV. [redacted] said she has become numb to the abuse and did not feel scared, not like in the beginning. He told me I was never to wear such slutty clothing and made me throw them all away (after beating my bottom). Wife Undermines Her Husbands Authority in Front of Children, He DisciplinesHer? Wheres the barf bag? It took such a long time because that line had been blurred from growing up and then being married. He had a bad day and I think that made him getting angry easier. This is the right relationship for people to live in my opinion. I started going to their church and before long was a very active member. And he would sometimes spout off this genteel junk about how men should be nice to ladies. Just as our Lord washed the feet of His disciples, it wasnt to show that He was beneath them, but to show that real leadership serves. Regina, christianforums.net, 9. Dont just believe what an individual survivor tells you: though survivors have much wisdom based on their own experiences, their own experiences may not be generalisable to others completely, and this applies ESPECIALLY in regards to legal options. I just dont have the time or energy to debate people like A Lone Voice. Please go and speak to a pastor in a completely different church from the one they were in (I should recommend a sister in a Pentecostal church, but thats just my personal suggestion) and I know you will get more than a sympathetic ear. Serving Kids: Lets get this straight. Pastor then took over and showed Ben that I wouldnt break if I was spanked properly, and I got my first real spanking of my life. May we all be "wounded healers" who do no harm. Finally, Daisy be more Christ-like; keep your nose out of my bedroom. Well I finally got my first Spanking! Cant get strength that will defend them a la Roy Rogers, so you get strength that will slap you around a la Gray or John Wayne in his worse moments. Yes, that makes a lot of sense it was a normal progression for you. I had another thought about thetransfer of headship in marriage. My father and two of my grandfathers had no business leading, and had no business having authority. Gods judgments from Gen 3:14 3:17 set matters straight, and gave the man more work into the bargain. And if it wasnt enough, beyond this exceptional event its pretty clear that mockery is absolutely not the normal approached followed by preachers, teachers and prophets recorded in the Bible. Thats a rule for ancient Israel, for young women still living at home with their fathers. As a little girl my biggest dream was to have the right to say NO to sex, NO to men. Now no one complains to the Pastor at Bible school anymore I can tell you. And dont tell me you never wanted to have sex on an altar! christian domestic discipline A History of the Corporal Discipline of Women January 11, 2023 In this third and final part of my three-part series on Christian Domestic Discipline, we explore how the practice of domestic discipline continue through the middle-ages and even into America up until the mid-20th century. No this isnt the argument at all. As a strong-willed person, I see submission as a form of feminine chivalry. Most will realize when they watch Pat Robertsons clip on moving to Saudi Arabia so a husband cant beat his wife, that Pat Robertson was joking not insisting. I can remember being a little girl (probably middle school age) and hearing someone tell me the Scripture in Ephesians that calls women to submit to their husbands. Just like there are many realities behind the word marriage, there are many realities behind the term domestic discipline. Ive been exploring submission for some time, and the one thing that I have discovered above anything else is the fact that wifely submission brings harmony to a home. . The first thing we were told was a regularly scheduled spanking, and maintenance spanking, was needed, and it should be daily in the beginning. Aspire to knowledge and aspire to love, declare yourself ignorant and humble and you will find justice and wisdom for God does not reveal himself to arrogant people and this is why you are in darkness on this matter., This is another thing you do: you cover the altar of the LORD with tears, with weeping and with groaning, because He no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. For this is also the main way families have been organized for thousands of years. I totally respect that your religious view (whether or not you consider yourself atheists, this really is a religious decision, a lifestyle choice), I totally respect that your religious view may be equality-driven feminist relationships. christian domestic discipline A History of the Corporal Discipline of Women January 11, 2023 In this third and final part of my three-part series on Christian Domestic Discipline, we explore how the practice of domestic discipline continue through the middle-ages and even into America up until the mid-20th century. Those laws included things that happened in the bedroom between consenting adults. There is no such thing as physical discipline of a WIFE, period. And please dont discount the experiences of those whove suffered under religious patrio-centrism or just plain chauvinism. If you didnt, you wouldnt have your job for very long, would you?! I met Ben, my husband, at a work function, and when I found out he was a Christian agreed to go out with him. Really, if you get off on spanking your wife (or are a wife who gets off on being spanked by her man), just chalk it up to your personal choice and stop trying to find biblical proof texts for it. You can get in my face and scream it, and it still wont be a proof. You need to give their views more serious study and attention. Finally, Daisy be more Christ-like; keep your nose out of my bedroom.. Seriously, Lone, as our gracious hostess notes, there are many disagreements on this site, which is why this thread has over 100 comments. Im about the only one here who actually quotes scripture. Click on the image at the top or you can click here to go BGRLearning.com to subscribe and listen to this series as well as hundreds of other biblical gender roles related podcasts. I found an old post of yours from last year. May we all work to protect women and expose this shameful sin and crime in our churches. that. Thank you so much for answering all of these questions and your willingness to share your story publicly. No fool in his right mind would buy this as a legitimate way to have a relationship, Alsdurf says. Those who advocate domestic discipline do so on the basis of several passages taken out of context and wildly interpreted. And you just assume I am a man because it never enters your intolerant head that a woman could actually want to put herself under her husbands headship. On the other hand the very fact that you would use these laws as precedents legitimizing the outlawing of something as personal and initimate as domestic discipline proves on its own that these laws are problematic. It was then agreed upon that my Tuesday spanking would be given at our counseling session, so they could see Bens progress. It seems that site is promoting equal rights for women. Are you serious? In the case you need to discipline your wife while on a voyage, you know you can do so without attracting attention. What Is The Husbands Role In Christian Domestic Discipline? What do you mean by Feminist site? Wifes getting spanked like being spanked. Submissive is not a four-letter word. Change). A few folks are gonna paddle each other. It makes complete sense that someone raised in this culture would extend it to domestic abuse. So dont quote the half of a verse which you like, miss out the half you dont and then accuse me of distorting verses when all I did was quote them! God told the Israelites to pass laws and enforce them. I believe that the only people to spank a woman is a father, husband, mother, and maybe a disciplinarian. Im wondering what their thoughts were on it? Many people even literally proceed in the manner I have just described. My daughters and I attend Sunday school that our pastor does for all the women who get spanked when they are bad. Abusing men need to be taken to task (no, I dont know how, and in some cases they just never will be) but the fact of their existence does not mean God was wrong to say that the man is the head of the wife and that he shall rule over thee. Yes, Im guilty of being obscure at times. It isnt called getting hit. If you are currently living (or have lived) the Christian Domestic Discipline lifestyle and you would like to share how it has helped your marriage or relationship, please email your story and mention that you wish to share your experiences with other people. At least thats his justification but this is far far more severe than spankings. At times he could be very sweet and charming. What a heartless bunch. I think there were many times two which I was so disobedient that my parents would have not known what to do unless they had given me a spanking and set me straight. Are you insisting that your reading of these passages is the only possible correct one? I cant remember if you said how long you were married. But even then, it is always amazing how Eph 5:21 always ignored. I am in my early 30s and this past 4th of July I was there and we had a bit of an argument. If it makes it hotter for them to mix in some faith? She will need to learn some self-control with not crying out, or bite a pillow to keep quiet. In 1Cor 7:4, the wife and the husband having power or authority over each others bodies is in the context of them not refusing each other conjugal relations (due benevolence). If I put my wife in a french maid or indian princess outfit, am I not seeing, at least in part, a french maid or indian princess? This makes it all more more important for the victim and her supporters to be persistent in calling for help, and politely pressing for the workers and the justice system to do what they can do. They want to give. As a society have always restricted what two consenting adults can do. I love them but our relationship is often strained. _Deborah and the no available men argument_. When I got older and was being bullied or harassed by other men or women, you know who defended me? These three core values are essential: Communication, Consent, & Compassion. I know this is true. What was it like in my Patriarchal home, you ask? The best part of domestic discipline is what has happened emotionally between this long-time married couple. Bike Bubba, when your wife dresses as a french maid, you still see her, albeit as a french maid, and not Kim Kardashian or some other woman (and I really fear for your taste as well Kim Kardashian of all people). ), You said, Dont just say my position is not Biblical, argue it, prove it from scripture, of course.. So-called Christian domestic discipline occurs in a marriage when one or both partners use biblical support to rationalize an unscriptural and un-Christian lifestyle. How does a Christian man go about introducing Domestic Discipline into his marriage and what techniques actually work? Were they surprised by it? :o). I do not and will not oblige him in his depravity. Such as, not seeing them alone, only meeting in public, and if you need overnight accommodations to see them, NEVER stay at their place or let them stay at yours. When you wrote: You cannot find a single Bible verse that says that never married adult women must submit to a man because there is no such concept you had forgotten Numbers 30:3-5. But when you come back home, keep in mind that the world is not a war zone. But having said all that, you have something practical, but difficult, which you must do. Either they think you are into some sort of kinky lifestyle or they think you are a mindless doormat. None of us ever dared. The last paragraph of Laurens e-mail revealed her parentssided with Laurens husband and believed her to be disobedient to her husband. Even interpreting the Bible in an incorrect way as you do to read authority into the Bible, your view only addresses married mothers, and is not applicable or workable for never-married women, widows, the infertile, the childfree or the divorced. It is strength under control, it is bridled strength.First Peter 3:1 says, In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives.It is very difficult to have two heads of authority.It doesnt work in the military, it doesnt work I mean, you have one president, you know what Im saying? Candace, huffingtonpost.com, 4. It looks sort of like leadership to those who have never seen the real thing. Maybe youve experienced a lot, maybe youve seen a lot, and this experience has lead you to be more emotional than rational and to err on the wrong side of history. Christian Domestic Discipline / Spencer Respect and Submission in domestic discipline Respect and Submission are of particular importance in a marriage because the standard marriage vows for the bride always included the phrase to love, honor and obey her husband. 1 Peter 3:7. My husband and I would be considered rather boring by most people. [redacted] never told the investigating deputy the truth about what was going on that night because Jamin told her they would both be arrested, and law enforcement would take their children away. There is a judge and there is a criminal, the judge proclaims a sentence against the criminal which is carried out. You should address your own problems before aspiring to protect people against themselves. It seems the only difference between the role of a father and the role of new husband is that the new husband gets sexual privileges and now has someone to cook and clean for him, and bear children. They plan these relationships and there is no knowledge asymmetry. Not sure whether you can hear me in the doghouse (or if youre even hanging around anymore), but Id like to offer some insight as to why you might have ended up there. And then after that we will spend several articles looking at cultural views of domestic discipline in America before the modern age. I suggested you start with an interlinear to see how the Greek is worded just for starters but I keep forgetting you need phallic permission. its called, http://lisasjoydd.blogspot.com. (also known as gender complementarianism, biblical womanhood, patriarchy) But unlike the "Cry U.S.E." Youll get prayers and someone standing with you to get rid of the bad stuff and move on. Hes not a victim, hes a kinky dude with odd underwear. . So: Do you see both yourself and your partner as people who need physical discipline? Soooo he is a modern psychologist? Later my dad told me that he was glad I have a husband who keeps me in line and that I had better behave if I dont want him to repeat it. In Laurens situation, she described her husband as calm and never in anger, yet he referred to her in demeaning terms, little girl, as a father would say to a child. Its because sje disrespected me. 1. When I read you, I see sincere people suffering sort of post-traumatic disorder. Our families, and some of our friends think we are nuts, me mostly, for living this way, but I can honestly say that the 10 years of our marriage I am most happy knowing that I can at any moment end up crying with a sore bottom over my husbands lap. and going through Judges 4:9 all the way to Eph 5:23 and 1Tim 2:12). When this day happens, the laws will already have been written but will not be enforced or taken seriously anymore, so with many regards, the state of women will be worse than it used to be because theyll be nothing clear they can do to improve their fate. Christian Domestic Discipline / Spencer Respect and Submission in domestic discipline Respect and Submission are of particular importance in a marriage because the standard marriage vows for the bride always included the phrase to love, honor and obey her husband.